


Pillow Talk

by PatchworkIdeas



Series: WinterFRE 2020 [18]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff, Honesty, M/M, Pillow Talk, Promises
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:09:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22892269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PatchworkIdeas/pseuds/PatchworkIdeas
Summary: Some nights are made for sharing and listening and holding each other close.
Relationships: Fíli/Kíli (Tolkien)
Series: WinterFRE 2020 [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1604650
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25
Collections: GatheringFiKi - Winter FRE 2020





	Pillow Talk

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Prompt Nr.106:  
> “How long have you known?”

“How long have you known?”

“Years.” 

A beat. A continuation.

“I couldn't tell you. You deserved to live your own life, without this hanging over your head.”

“Hanging over my head?! Fee, _I love you_! Even if I hadn’t fallen in love with you, I still would have...” Kili’s indignation is real, but the passion fizzles out fast. They both know better. Love between brothers isn’t something that’s supposed to be forgivable. 

“I love you too, but I couldn't tell you. Couldn’t risk it. Even if you hadn’t hated me for it, kept it secret even, the chance that I could have influenced you...” Fili swallows, but presses on. “You fell for me the way I fell for you, accidental, without meaning to. A relationship like ours isn’t easy. I never would have forgiven myself for leading you down this path when you could have found happiness much easier elsewhere. And I never would have stopped worrying that I coerced you somehow, manipulated you. That’s the real problem with incest after all, isn’t it? Even without kids in the equation, how often are these relationships unbalanced, toxic? I couldn't risk it. I would rather not have you, then have you miserable for the rest of your life.”

Kili sighs, curls closer around Fili, resting his head on his brother’s naked chest. Perhaps it’s not the best pillow talk, but it’s probably best to get it out while they are both comfortable and happy, rather than dancing around it, pretending it doesn’t exist.  
They are brothers. Just because the world requires that they hide it, doesn’t mean they have to hide from each other too.

“You would never hurt me or manipulate me.”

“Which is why I didn’t say anything.” 

Kili playfully swats at Fili for the interruption.

“Hush you, my turn!” 

Fili chuckles and hums his agreement, while pulling Kili just that bit closer. He can’t reach his brother’s forehead in their current position without jostling them both, but he hopes the way he holds him speaks for itself. He starts running his fingers through Kili’s hair just the way his little brother has always loved. Because he can, because he wants to, because going another day without showing his affections in every way he can is unthinkable. 

Despite the go ahead, Kili is silent for a bit, gathering his thoughts and enjoying Fili’s ministrations.

“I trust you.” Kili eventually starts, fingers painting little idle circles on Fili’s skin, getting lost in the fine, curly hairs, only to hide themselves in the softness, before starting all over again. “And I think I get it, even if I wish it hadn’t been necessary. So much lost time and misery we could have avoided.” 

Kili sighs, thinking of past relationships, never long, messed up dates and nights spend being miserable together because they had perfection, that one relationship all others were compared to and fell flat against. How often had he said “I wish I could find something like this, like us.”  
Kili doesn’t remember, but is all too aware of how painful it must have been for Fili, always there, and always out of reach.

“I’m just glad we finally figured it out.” Kili moves from his comfortable position to steal a kiss before continuing, still propped up and looking into Fili’s eyes. “Just promise me that you will come to me in the future. Even if you think something might hurt me or make me uncomfortable. We are a team now, ok? In this together?”

Fili uses the proximity to steal a kiss of his own, readily reciprocated, lips and tongues moving languidly, tasting and cherishing each other.

“I promise.” He whispers in Kili’s ear when his brothers arms eventually give in and Kili goes back to using Fili as a pillow. He’s higher up now, and it’s not exactly a comfortable position, but the proximity makes up for any poking ribs or squashed lungs. “I love you, and I finally have you. I’m not giving that up for anything in the world. I’m yours for as long as you will have me.”

Kili chuckles this time, his mirth reverberating through both their chests. “Good.” And adds, after trailing kisses up Fili’s throat, bared in supplication and enjoyment both, “Then you are mine for life, because I ain’t giving you up. Ever.”

They kiss, change position, cuddle, only to come together again, like moths drawn to a flame. Sleep seems so wasteful in quiet moments like this, when they can have each other’s company instead. They don’t feel the need to chase their pleasure tonight, just wanting to appreciate the moment, the way they come together, wrapped up and blissfully happy in each others arms.

There is no ring on either of their hands, but the thread connecting their hearts is so much stronger than any metal band could ever be. They don’t need approval or acceptance from the world. They have each other, and that’s all that matters.


End file.
